Monday, March 30, 2009

Rains and a Sense Of Humour


Thought for the day:The way we see the problem is the problem...-- Stephen Covey

'Kutte Billi Baras Rahe Hain' is all I can say. i.e. it's raining cats and dogs. Here I was, thinking that the January monsoon season has passed, and, since last week when the hailstones made their presence felt, we've been having rains out here. Today was tremendous, with one of the thunderclaps lasting a full 30 seconds. I'm sure disaster, i.e. lightning struck somewhere. The paper will tell.
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Do you watch Pogo or Cartoon Network? I don't mean violent serials like Tom and Jerry, of course...(Though, I am a fan!LOL)..

Don't say 'how kiddish'- just try it- it's good to feel like a kid at heart, sometimes!:)

Programs like Pogo's ' Just For Laughs'- they're enough to pull anyone out of a dull mood, like I was in, yesterday.(Which is why I sat down to post and didn't, finally-no point in posting if my mood's not right, I feel). It's a program where they play simple and sometimes complex tricks on people on the street.(We do have a program like that, on NDTV-Chhupa Rustam,but, it's much less tricky). Like, there was:

-This huge cover they'd put on a car in a parking lot, to make it seem as if the car had been parked since a long time. And, the car owners would invariably come there, look mystified, turn around, look everywhere, and wonder where their car had gone.. finally, they'd find it, of course.
- This pretty lady who'd suddenly sidle up to a couple, and start acting cozy with the guy- the reactions from the other lady would be anything from catty to a snarl!!:)
- This group of footballers who'd suddenly appear out of nowhere, surround a person and then bend down in a 'team gettogether session' before game.
- The guy in the scary masks shop, who put on the scariest mask and hairy hands, and, stood like a mask with the others..and, as soon as someone would touch a mask, he'd make a snarling noise, scaring the wits out of the person(s). Here's a link to some of them.

Of course, it also made me wonder- would people in our country display just as good a sense of humour as most of these people did? Perhaps not. Maybe even a communal riot could occur, with some of the pranks if they were played in India.But, we are progressing, definitely, as some of the Chhupa Rustam episodes showed.
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Till next time,keep smiling.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Fines!


Thought for the day:The hardest challenge is to be yourself in a world where everyone is trying to make you be somebody else. -- E. E. Cummings

Two of them-strategic placement. On either side of the road, cleverly concealed behind either a tree or a pillar. People walk out of the bus stop, take the short cut to cross the small one-bus-and-one-car wide road. From the other side, people walk out of Carrefour, again in a hurry, and cross the road from there to the bus stop. Out come both the guys. Out come the notebooks. Hand over your labour card. Wham!You're fined AED 200. Go to Al Barsha and take it back. That place is another 50 dirhams away by taxi. So, AED 250*13= Rs. 3250/- gone. And, when a poor guy narrates this, I can't help but feel sorry for him. And, of course, my resolve to avoid crossing the road at non-zebra crossings deepens. Yep, life and money are too hard earned to let them go this way. I'm told by the guy that they fined @ 150 people that way, in the half hour that he was there(Obviously, peak hour, the time when people are returning home)...so, 150*Rs 3250/-. Go figure- if they start doing this in Andheri, for example, the Municipal coffers will be overflowing in no time at all. But then, human life there is slightly less valued there than it is, here. Hence, pedestrians crossing the road is one of the least worrying of topics.
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 Ping!Ping! I was on my walk today and looked up, wondering what madman would be chucking pieces of chalk from his balcony. And, OMG..it was small hailstones..pieces of ice falling from the sky. Saw this little,maybe 7 yr ole rushing across the street, holding on to a building wall,flat, shouting 'Mummy,mummy'....well, maybe the tyke's not read enough about weather in his geography lessons,yet. I did wonder- was this weather 'normal' or was it a result of cloud seeding, like it was about two years back?
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Came home, slightly drenched and feeling a bit exhausted..so,pressed the button for the elevator. It opens, and there's a guy inside dancing away in that small cubic,e,looking at himself in the full size(waist up) mirror inside. I wonder how long he's been dancing,with the door closed? He turns a bit red with embarassment, but, has to continue clicking his fingers and shaking his toes as the elevator door closes and we go up to the first floor!!ROFL..what a day!!Thank God it's Thursday tomorrow, and I had a good laugh a day before!!

Till next time,keep smiling.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Predictions


Quote for the day: Life is as easy as 3.141592653589

Ah, another week began yesterday. Let's see what the Piscean predictions are:
Paper 1:

- If ever there was a time to speak up, with passion and conviction and what you believe in, it's now. Waste no time worrying about gathering facts, crafting the right words or even whether you've thought things through. The depth of your feelings will get your message across, loud and clear.

Paper 2:
- You may be in contact with people who are gripped by an obsession. Rather than resisting the temptation to join in and fight fire with fire, let this not act as a stimumus to triger your own passions this week.

Haha- now, aren't those two contradictory? Well, I read between the lines, so, will review on Thursday evening to see whether my reading is correct. (Have to update the previous week's predictions,i.e. the results,too!!:)

Someone had asked in a paper what the right gift for a Piscean is, and the reply was more complex than I could imagine:
-Intricate and delicate styles stimulate a Piscean person's senses and spirit. Pisces truly appreciates the beautiful and the magical in both design and presentation.
-......will read the rest of it in the evening...time to head for work now..another busy day!!!!

Thursday, March 19, 2009

The Sandwich

For some reason, I'm filled with nostalgia today..maybe because I'm missing travelling by Baroda Express or Rajdhani Express or any of the other trains for more than a decade, nearly every other month, when I was in my first company- it would usually be to Mumbai or Delhi or one of the cities in Gujarat...and, a sandwich would always be the most hygienic food on the trains/at the stations!!:) Ah, this miracle of an invention- will check out wikipedia to learn it's origins!:)


But, this memory goes earlier than that. I'm reminded of the sandwich served at the Railway Station- it was always a favourite for me- and, I'd always be trying to convince Dad to take me there when we were near the station. What was special about it? Well, it was something like the pic above- they'd cut it in the centre, and then, the two halves would be cut further in their centres, and then reversed, to form a star. And, those four pieces would taste much better than two whole slices of bread....and, since then, my facination for the sandwich has remained, till today, and, I'm sure will remain in the future too. Today, probably coz of my current diet, I'm enjoying sandwiches, but, of wholemeal bread(Can't 'stomach' too much of white bread...LOL), with salad  items filled in them. And, they've really helped the diet, besides the walking,et al...reached nearly halfway to my 'drop-weight' target, in two months, which is not bad ...now, I'm sure that's made you curious as to what my target is? Ask and thee shall be told all!!Specially,if you need any encouragement to diet!!

And , someone was mischievously(I think) wondering what I was going to write about, when I said that I had 'sandwich' as one of my forthcoming topics!! Hehe!! Hope you enjoyed the post, pal!!I wouldn't think of any other kind of sandwiches!Tauba Tauba!Perish such thoughts!

Joke for the day:
Q: What gets longer when pulled, fits between your orbs, inserts neatly in a hole and works best when jerked?
A: A seat belt, of course(Whatever were you thinking of? tauba,tauba!!)

Till next time, cheerio and keep smiling.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Find The Man

Find The Man:

THE TRICK IS TO FIND THE MAN AMONG THE COFFEE BEANS:
This is bizarre - after you find the guy - it's so obvious.  Once you find him - it's embarrassing, and you think, why didn't I see him immediately?





Doctors have concluded that if you find the man in the coffee beans in 3 seconds, the right half of your brain is better developed than most people.  If you find the manbetween 3 seconds and 1 minute, the right half of the brain is developed normally.  If you find the man between 1 minute and 3 minutes, then the right half of your brain is functioning slowly and you need to eat more protein.  If you have not found the man after 3 minutes, the advice is to look for more of this type of exercise to make that part of the brain stronger!!!
And, yes, the man is really there!!!
(It took me around 15 seconds..now,you be honest and tell me-how much time did it take you?)

Monday, March 16, 2009

Happiness,last words


Happiness is: The delighted look on a NRI's face, when the rupee falls against the dollar, and,naturally, against the dirham which is pegged to the dollar. That is, of course, if it's at the right time-around payday and he wants to transfer money. On such days, I always take my walk via the UAE exchange area, to see the smiling faces of customers there(And, sometimes I'm lucky enough to be one of the smileys). How mean NRIs can be, na- to be happy when our currency drops..well,in these times of recession and pink slips, every little,err, slip counts, na? Of course, it has also led to the 'into 12' factor becoming the 'into 14'factor! (You know what this means, right?
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Got this one as a forward and couldn't help smiling at most of the accuracy outlined therein..(I can see some claws coming out, now...*runs for cover*):

9 famous 'last words/phrases ' women use-what they say and what they mean:
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

 (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men.   A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' .   That will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F--- YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

I smiled again, reading the last lines of the email:

* Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.

* Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, 'cause they know it's true!!!

 

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Recession Notes

(Note: The above cartoon is a dig at the rush with which towers were being announced here. So, whoever made this tower, was making an awesome metaphor)

Have you ever been nostalgic? I bet you have-about anything-from childhood to school days to college days to first loves to....:) You see that someone or something and memories come flooding back.

Ah, but I bet you've never been nostalgic the way people are these days, out here- they're nostalgic about traffic. Good Lord, was my first reaction. First they used to groan about how the traffic here never allows them to be on time for anything- a meeting, a date, a dental appointment. People who had office at 8 AM, would reach at 9 AM-purportedly because of traffic.

Now, with the current recession-like situation, the roads are relatively less crowded. So, they groan about that..I've been victim to dialogues like(From people whose jobs are secure so far):

- I used to reach from Bur Dubai to Rashidiya in nothing less than an hour- now, I'm there in 20 minutes.**sad look on face**

- You see this street? Four months back, there used to be a queue of vehicles here- from heeeeere to theeeeere*hands gesticulating wildly*.***sad look on face***.

- I used to wait for 1.5 hours for a taxi. Now, we are back to the days when just raising the arm to scratch my hair, brings a taxi or two or three screeching to a stop in minutes.**sad look on face**.

- I don't get my fill of music on Radio FM these days, since the time spent on the road is so less.**sad look on face**.

The only thing I can do on hearing such remarks is roll my eyes upwards and smile. People, what is there in life that makes you crib about everything? Why can you not feel happy that your job, at least, is secure,so you shouldn't look sad? 

- I,for one, am pretty happy that I reach office and home in 20 minutes maximum, as against the earlier 45 minutes.(Our Company bus, of course- I wouldn't drive here, ever-love my short life too much). 

-I'm also happy that I can listen to Radio FM when home, instead of 'on the road', since the cacophony of sounds of others in the bus doesn't let me enjoy songs.

- I'm pretty happy that we can catch a taxi so easily, the rare times I want to travel by it(Beyond walkable distance). More than that,

- I'm thrilled with the new RTA(Roads and Transport Authority)  routes for buses, and the increased frequency- these buses are nothing short of luxurious(Will put up a pic or two one of these days) and link major parts of Dubai with each other.

Now, if I want to be sad, it would be for some friends who lost their jobs, for people in general who have suddenly been told that their services are not required, who have loans and do not have any way to repay them and hence have to resort to flight, who are sending their families home so that they can save a bit more till their jobs are intact. I hope everyone sees a silver lining in the clouds, sooner rather than later.

On another note, today's fortune says:

When it comes to increasingly pressing demands, timing is as important as what you actually say. These may seem urgent. Still, you're better off waiting until after Mars, the planet of ego and energy, moves into Pisces this Sunday and strengthens the courage of your convictions.

Amen to that!!Exactly what I was thinking- the right timing!! So, will wait for Sunday onwards.*grins*.

Have a great day, everyone!!

Oh,yes,interesting joke that gave me the first smile of the day:

It's a little known fact that Julius Caesar did NOT die from stab wounds by Brutus... but rather he was poisoned.

At the huge banquet on that fateful Ides of March, Brutus slipped some poisonous hemlock leaves onto Julius's salad. (This was the world's first Caesar's salad!)

When Julius slumped over into his salad, Brutus feigned concern and asked: "My dear friend Julius, how many hemlock leaves have you eaten?"

To which Julius gasped in reply: . .. "Ate two, Brutus."

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And, on the naughtier side:
Wife to hubby: Just because "it's awake" when you get up does not mean I have to "kiss it good morning."

Byeee!!

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Pisces


1. You just have to play by the rules;you don't get a chance to make them. If you are obedient today you will have ample opportuinties in the week ahead to flaunt your uniqueness and stray from the beaten path.

2.One of your biggest challenges is saying a firm and uncompromising no. You intend to, but then soften it, saying 'perhaps' or 'maybe'. One particular individual is counting on this. When they've been pushy in the past, you've always given in. But this is the beginning of a new era, and it starts with them.

3.If you think about making major changes now, remember there is a cosmic red light in the heavens. If you stick to the rules, and don't take resentment and criticism personally, you will emerge unscathed.
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Whew!Those three 'your stars today' predictions, pretty much summed up what's been running in my mind the last 7 days. Now, to wait for next Sunday to come and see how things progressed!!Will update here!

Off to work, now!First day of the week.

Thursday, March 05, 2009

Smile of the week

Yesterday, I was locking the door to the flat, when leaving for the day at work(And, believe me, it was hectic). I glanced at our neighbour's door and saw a yellow stick-it note on it. I've always seen such notes in our building in Baroda, where people scribble on all sorts of papers, even on newspapers with a sketchpen(The right thing to do-conserves paper), and leave notes for the milkman or the building watchman who doubles as a milkman to earn a bit of money- to leave 2 bags of milk or no milk or something to that effect. 

We don't have any milkmen in Dubai, at least, not that I know of, so, curiosity got the better of my and I peered at the note. What it said gave me the first smile of the day.

'Hey, Baby,
Don't call  MeMom is at home today,
 :) Girl'

Images of a gangster sitting next to the phone(Oh, I've seen enough Bollywood movies too), ready to shout the 'kutte, kamine-meri beti se door rehna' dialogues, floated into my mind...and, I was still grinning, as I walked down the stairs(I hate using the lift- my bit towards conserving electricity, and, further, the flat's on the first floor...ROFL), and, then, realized that what the note said was:

'Hey, Baby,
Don't call  Me Mom is at home today,
 :) Girl'

That makes more sense, huh? Thank God- I needed that smile yesterday...the day was probably the worst, 'hectic'ality wise, since the past two months.

  

Monday, March 02, 2009

Problem Solving


That's the name of the game-an old flowchart, but, the home truth hits every few months!

Time to read' Who Moved My Cheese', I believe!