Happiness is: The delighted look on a NRI's face, when the rupee falls against the dollar, and,naturally, against the dirham which is pegged to the dollar. That is, of course, if it's at the right time-around payday and he wants to transfer money. On such days, I always take my walk via the UAE exchange area, to see the smiling faces of customers there(And, sometimes I'm lucky enough to be one of the smileys). How mean NRIs can be, na- to be happy when our currency drops..well,in these times of recession and pink slips, every little,err, slip counts, na? Of course, it has also led to the 'into 12' factor becoming the 'into 14'factor! (You know what this means, right?
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . That will bring on a 'whatever').
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F--- YOU!
(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.
I smiled again, reading the last lines of the email:
* Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.
* Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, 'cause they know it's true!!!