Monday, September 17, 2007

Hel-loo



Thought for the day: If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans. WOODY ALLEN


I came across this article some time back, in my search for,err,quality loos for some clients. And, couldn’t help wondering whether this one would replace a few doctors if it became economical enough? Developed by Toto , this toilet measures glucose levels, BP, fat percentage and your weight.Needless to say that all this information can be transferred to your PC.
The device cleans itself automatically after the one-minute long test. Life mein aur kya chaahiye?(What else do you need in life?)
What next, will the loo also recommend the ideal diet for you based on BMI?

Oops, did I say, life mein aur kya chahiye? How about music? Still on Toto, they have come up with a Toilet MP3 that has an MP3 player with an SD slot. The toilet bowl lid is raised and lowered automatically (before and after use) and you do not have to turn back to flush the toilet - the controls are on the wall. Now that is one cool toilet! Time for some c-rap music, anyone?

And,here I was, thinking that the remote sensor operated flush system was too much-you know, finish the poo(p), get up, it flushes, if too much poo(p), you have to sit again so that the sensor senses your bums and operates the flush again when you get up. LOL.

So much for loo(ny) talk, on to more, err, cheerful topics.
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This month, from sunrise to sunset, all restaurants/eateries remain closed(Except in a select few places like Dubai Internet City). Seems quite a depressing sight, sometimes, seeing chairs overturned and kept on tables, which usually,err, teem with life. All private offices work two hours less than normal(Including us,ahem), and, no-one is supposed to be seen on the streets, either eating, or,drinking(No, not even H2O) or smoking. If caught, a heavy fine and imprisonment for a month or so await. This year, people seem to be pretty well-behaved,so far.

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Do you F5? (Mehak, are you listening?)..It has nothing to do with hi5, or, any cheery handshakes....I get totally confused, sometimes, with my own blog, and with other blogs. It seems the PC's cache loves to hold on to ole posts, and, so , each time I log on to a site, I'm left wondering whether I should F5 to check for new posts? How do you delete cache memories automatically?I've to do some searches for this, unless one of you knows. There's nothing more frustrating than to know after a week,that you're stuck on the cache while the blogger has posted three new posts already.Grin.

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End jokes:

A Toilet is like a committee meeting.
People come with lot of pressure, sit, create a lot of noise, and ultimately DROP THE MATTER.

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A man takes his wife to a livestock show. They start heading down the alley where the bulls are kept. A sign in front of the first bull says: “This bull mated 50 times last year.”

The wife turns to her husband and says, “He mated 50 times in a year! You could learn from him.”

They proceed to the next bull and that sign states: “This bull mated 65 times last year.”

The wife turns to her husband and says, “This one mated 65 times last year. That’s over 5 times a month. You can learn from this one, big time.”

They proceed to the last bull and his sign reads: “This bull mated 365 times last year.”

The wife’s mouth drops open as she gasps, “WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That’s ONCE A DAY! You could really learn from this one!”

The man turns to his wife and says, “Yeah, okay. Go on up and inquire if it was 365 times with the same cow.”

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Till next time, keep smiling.

16 comments:

mystic rose said...

I think I must have read your jokes on an empty stomach *grumpy*

ha ha ha ha..

I think there's a huge difference between a man and a bull. Or atleast should be. (Now I know i will probabaly get flak for this).

tadaz.

wacko said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
wacko said...

hmm you can prolly delete the cache thingy from the internet options...delete the history and everything and prolly then try opening the site again..am not sure though..

and the toilet thingy was quite cool you know :P

Shreya said...

Toto is brilliant! If there is one thing that I love about foreign countries like US and Japan, it is the fact that they thrive on innovation driven by unconventional thinking because the masses are ready to spend on new technologies! ... and the jokes were as usual - funny :)

Curious said...

Hola Amitji

the loo thingy... am not so sure abt the MP3 but Auto flush toilets are kewl and needed... i really don't wanna enter a dirty public loo! sheesshhh!!!!

But somehow i do really wan some sorta music in public toilets.. I neither wanna hear the next cube female's evening dinner plans sitting in a loo or her bowel moments and sounds.. yukk!!! Am sorry that's as discreet as i can write on it!

On the ramadan restaurants... Well am happy that some of my favo eatout's have take away's so am happy... :D No complaints!

I have a mac..And sometimes F5 don't work..So I click on shift button and the reload button on the web browser simultaneously..! It works...

twilight said...

:D amusing stuff about the loos!

perfect read to cure the splitting headache I've had all afternoon :)

Marlee said...

Amit...I totally enjoyed reading on the diff options of toilets...wish we had more (cheaper as well) options for bathrooms in DU!

The toilet joke was ewwwww...Bull was funny! :))

DICEY said...

I found the most interesting loos in Japan. Heated toilet seats and special devices that produce sound (chirping birds or flushing noises) to conceal your... bodily noises ;)

Keshi said...

HAHAHAHA Amit ty!

btw I love that bird pic..lol so cute!!


Keshi.

Sweetstickychewy said...

Oh my..:O most Restaurants and eateries Closed due to the fasting month...? wow...

Dubai is a full pledged muslim country?


And the Loos..Lol..Hmm..What hassle human goes through to come up with this stuffs! Amusing indeeds!lol..

I can't help but wonder what more will we be coming up in the future.

Cheers!

mystic rose said...

and that pic just cracks me up!!!!

austere said...

Good luck with the fasting season.
Would you be fasting for one day? I used to, till last year.

Lolly said...

I just love potty humour ;)

The picture is TOO funny xxx

AmitL said...

Hi,Mystic..hahaha...hope u feel less grumpy now...as for that comment on man and a bull...ROFL.:)

AmitL said...

Hi,Wacko..I tried all that..that's the manual method of deletion..I wanted to know how to auto-delete the cache.:)

AmitL said...

Hi,Shreya...yes,Toto is really innovative..but,innovations do take place in our country,too,nowadays..:)
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Hi,curious...your comments are all noted.:)Tku.LOL at wanting music in a public loo.:)
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Hi,Twilight..tks..and,I do hope ur headaches get better.:)
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Hi,Marlee..I get your point about DU loos..:)But,someone has to take the initiative,na?And,in a govt sponsored univ,there's not many such people.
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Hi,Dicey...wow..you said it..Toto is also originally Japanese only.:)
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Hi,SweetSC..yes,Dubai is totally into Ramadan,these days..but,yes,in some specific zones,restaurants remain open(Nee,we're not in one of them-sigh)

And,yes,what efforts humans make for innovations.:)
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Hi,Mystic...haha..yes,I liked the pic,too.:)
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Hi,Austy..well,I'm usually on a diet,but,can't imagine fasting like this whole day,and,then eating for 2-3 hrs.Sighh.
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Hi,Lolly,glad u liked both-potty humour and the pic..:)