Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Spitting Part II

Thought for the day:The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

Oooph!!So much to write about,so many topics..and,yet,the work schedule over the past few days just leaves me wanting to sit blankly in front of the TV screen, watching either a movie or a comedy serial, after my evening walk. Anyway,things seem to be calming down.*touchwood*.So, I should be able to post regularly from today.
Going a step further from the Llama ad,let me ask-how would you feel if you were offered 5000 dirhams(A whopping 65k Indian Rs), for just giving some information? And,how would you feel if you were a gutka/paan masala/paan enthusiast? Well, that's what the Municipality's next step is-they've offered a reward of the afore-mentioned amount for each shop/shopkeeper/seller of the stuff that you let them know of. Of course,for the shop, it means curtains(shutdown),for the seller it means deportation. I jokingly mentioned this to a friend of mine who's addicted to the stuff. Specially since he's just quit his job and is on the lookout for another. So, I told him, here's a chance to give up your addiction,and make much more than you were making at your job for three years. (I'm sure he must be knowing at least a dozen of these peddlers, err, sellers). And, guess what his reaction was? Well,naturally, his first reaction was to spit(Arghh!!I hate that!) his gutka goo out,and, then,he said'Nahin,sir-phir hum kahaan jaayenge '(No, Sir-where would we go afterwards(for our daily needsof gutka)
Now, I haven't tried this gutka, ever-so, I'm not sure what makes it so addictive-I'm sure it's coz of the tobacco(Just like ciggie smokers), and the amount of concentration it provides. Nor am I a paan fan(Though, I do have one or two, when in India, and that too only the shingoda paan,which is more a mouth freshener than anything).
Now,for those not 'in the know' about paans, here's Baroda's most famous shop, which explains all about the stuff.
The two words that will clear out a men's rest room are, "Nice Dic*!"
The supervisor was confused about paying a bill, so he asked his secretary for some mathematical help. "If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" he asked her. The secretary replied, "Everything but my earrings."
What did the Indian say when the white man tied his pe*is in a knot?

"How come?" (Ah, I guess that's where this funny phrase originated.LOL)

Further office insults:
-I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
-You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
- I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.

-I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

-Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
Till next time, keep smiling!!


stony said...

* How come?


Monika Lewinski to her dry cleaner: See if you can remove this spot from my overcoat.

Dry cleaner, who was hard of hearing, said, "Come again?"

Monica: No, it's coffee spot.

austere said...

Looks like an Irani restaurant.

Expected to see " No maska-brun"

Keshi said...

**And, guess what his reaction was? Well,naturally, his first reaction was to spit

urrrrrrrrrg! cudnt u slap him?

LOL @How come!


rain girl said...

hehe wow what a law..kaash india mein ho jaye :P lolz

ishita said...

ughh...gutka :(

I liked the thought of the day....

and the jokes had me chuckling away...thnks fr sharing! :)

got my post up on BUF ... check it out!

Khamakha said...

"Everything but my earrings."!!
tht was hilariousssssss

Arunima said...

how come? :-)


AmitL said...

Hi,Stony..LOL at the Monica joke.
Hi,Austy-so true-it's an Irani Rest,one of the Mumbai ones.
Hi,Keshi-he's a friend-so,how could I slap him?personally I feel these habits should be a part of a person's upbrinding..but,sometimes they are so angry with the world,they keep spitting it out.
Hi,Rain Girl-yes,'d be a miracle,na,to have the law in India!!
Hi,Ishi-exactly my feeling'Ughhh!Gutka'..heh heh.
I did chk out ur post..:)
Hi,Sonali(Khamakha)-hehe!Can imagine u smiling.
Hi,Arunima-how come there's no further comment from u?:)